Reading v. Writing

Like (I'd assume) most "bloggers" out there, I've long felt a desire to make something of a writing career for myself.... I suppose that's why I began blogging originally. It certainly wasn't so that you could all read what I write. Because that thought mostly terrifies me. If you know me, it's obvious I'm not currently making a career out of writing. At least not fiction... or anything else interesting. I feel guilty for not writing more fairly often, which is where the title for this post comes in. I think my desire to write stems from my lifelong enjoyment of reading. There isn't much fiction out there that I can't become lost devouring. All of these excellent books over the years have been building my imagination to a place where I'm able to create characters and parts of plots on a whim. Maybe I'll gradually fall more comfortably into writing these thoughts down....maybe someday I'll find myself writing with the same energy I can easily apply to reading. :)

greek!

I think life tends to move forward in various stages of interests, loves and commitments. In college, for example, I spent my time learning and laughing with amazing roommates. I know there were classes thrown in during those years, but what I remember most are the times with amazing people who are still close friends.

After college I focused in on what has been a lifelong theme, learning, by going to law school. You'd think that would be enough of school (it really is), but only a few months after passing the bar I started the process of getting my CPCU designation - you don't really need to know what that is except that it is all about insurance. :)

Here enters my newest interest. I've slowly settled into the routine of living and working over the past two years, and throughout this "settling" I've felt myself being pulled with great urgency deeper into a consistent study of the bible. I joined a women's bible study at church last summer and have been amazed by how much I want to learn more and more. It started with a study of Daniel - and the genius of it all won't let me go.

I've been a Christian for the majority of my life and have been reading the bible for that entire period - so why now? Just to clarify, I've been reading the bible for years - this is more intentional and in depth. Hopefully I'll find some time to update you on my study from time to time. Maybe you're like me and stayed up past midnight on a Friday night studying greek words and bible commentaries? (If so, let me know and we'll talk support groups...)

new names

I decided to change the name of my blog. It's now going to be "sundae grey." There's no real reason for this other than - I like the way each of these words are spelled, and Ryan thought "sundae grey" sounded better than "grey sundae." I could go on now about how I crave change in all areas of my life, and I'm sure I'll change many things about this blog (including the name) from time to time.

In other news - it was warmer today!!

Calm

I'm sure it's obvious to you all by this point that I write on here sporadically at best. Sorry about that! : ) Anyway, I've been thinking the past day or so about the calm before a storm. This was mostly brought on by my (you're going to laugh at me for this) heartfelt concern for the birds. I was thinking about the promised blizzard and hoping that the geese who are kind enough to keep me company outside my office window some days would be able to fly away in time. Then, as it does far to often, my mind began to wander hopelessly and I found myself considering life before weather channels and convenient apps. I suppose, like the geese, people back then were attuned enough to the "feeling in the air" to know the blizzard would hit soon. This makes me want to watch or read Little House on the Prairie....Just so you know, I'm perfectly happy depending on technology to predict the weather.

Stay warm!

Blessed

Every once in a while we're blessed with moments of contentment. I'm there now. Maybe it's because my sister's most recent email included the lyrics to a Christmas song!! Maybe it's the thought of seeing my two best friends so soon for a full weekend of telling stories, revisiting our favorite Anderson spots, and remembering why we were able to live together for so many years and still love each other. Maybe it's because I'm taking a short break from studying, the lawn doesn't demand water EVERY day anymore (personifying the lawn by describing it as demanding paints a very accurate picture I feel), and I'm actually finding time to indulge in hobbies - i.e., some blogging and reading awesome christian science fiction books. :) (I know, I know...you can't wait for a review of that series!)

There's really no need to find a specific reason why, though. Whatever it is...I think I'll sit here and enjoy it for as long as it'd like to stay.

ps - Just so you know....it's definitely not because the past two nights the coyotes in our backyard (to clarify, I mean in the woods behind our house, which is basically our backyard) have been howling and howling. They're pretty much begging us to send out our pretty little black dog...This gives me more of an eerie feeling, which requires an entirely separate post.

Goodnight friends!

The Wind

And with that last great gust of wind, summer blew away for a while...

Perfectionism

“If I waited for perfection, I would never write a word.” Margaret Atwood

I stumbled across this quote today and it touched something I've been mulling over lately. I have this itch to be creative. It's quite evident in the times I've started creative projects throughout my life - like the time I took a water color class and the numerous times I've thought of book ideas.

Here's the rub, I also have this intense need inside me to only do things if I know I can do them well. This perfectionism tends to force me away from any creative project I attempt. If you know me, you know that I quit the water color class (the half finished painting resides in a bag of painting supplies in our spare bedroom), and perhaps even more important, the book ideas float out there tempting me and terrifying me at the same time.

Just so you know, I only recently realized this about myself....So now I'm going to attempt to overrule my perfectionistic side so that I can give my creativity a fighting chance. I think it's going to be a real battle...

(Are there support groups for this type of thing?) :)